Saturday, 19 December 2015

Random Dutch beers (part ten)

Hi there. Time for another of our little post-prandial whatever they ares. Chat, tasting, steaming pile of crap. The future will decide.

Weird experience, my visit to Ton Overmars between getting off the bus and throwing off my shoes at home. I didn't buy a single bottle of St. Bernardus. No Abt. No Prior. Just seven single beers. Clearly this beer-reviewing lark is getting out of hand.

Another from one of the brewery-less brewers:

Cinema Brewers Bock to the Future 6.5% ABV, 2.65 for 33cl
Full marks for the name. Slightly worried by the "Chocolate and vanilla porter" description. Muddy brown. Bit of a plippitty-ploppitty head. No, Swiss cheese head, full of holes. Malty sort of smell. Definitely chocolate in the gob. In an artificial flavour added way.* OK. Doesn't make me want to vomit or change religion. Like a couple of chunks of milk chocolate dissolved in Amstel Bok. Would be great, if I ate chocolate. Not to my taste.

"Do you want to try my beer, Andrew?"

Andrew briefly lifts his head from his soup and says, quietly, but firmly, "No."

"You know what to expect, don't you Andrew man?" says Dolores supportively.

"This one is too chocolately for me, Dolores."

She gets what I'm hinting at, but doesn't bite: "I'm too tired for all that now."

You'll have to take my word for it again.

The Sisters Brewery Queen Bee 7.7% ABV, €3.35 for 33cl
Naughty yellow, with a tinge of regret. A thorough beating lifts the head for a while, like a trout reaching for a fly. It soon sinks, like the heart of a teenage boy at each rejection. Smells hoppy. After my Uiltje embarrassment, I'll be steering well clear of ingredient-guessing. More twig than tropic in the hops. Bitter in a constructive way. And the bitterness hangs around, perhaps a little too long, like a crafty early-morning fart before the missus awakes.

* Based on my last attempt at ingredient guessing, I'm probably way off the mark and it's flavoured with the finest Venezuelan artisan chocolate.

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