Tuesday, 4 August 2009

My Franconian meals

"Dad, why did you photograph all your meals?" "Because I'm certifiable. No . . . . it's for a blog post. Yes, that's it. . . . Eat your pasta."

My holiday meals. What could possibly excite you more? Basket weaving? Curling? Arsenal? The Proms? Eastenders? IPA? Proust? Showers? Sun? Sea? Bathing suits? The first cuckoo of Spring? Thomas Mann?

Compared to all of those, it's bollock-tightening stuff. (In a good way.)

Don't expect any explanation. Except to say that arm is Mike's. Unless it's mine. I'm much fatter and older than he is. No prizes for spotting when it's me.

I missed a few meals. Sorry. Promise to do better next time. Hunger sometimes triumphed. You don't get to be my size by fasting.

I snapped my beers, too. Most of them. There must be something wrong with me. You would let me know if I went crazy, wouldn't you?

It will improve. Word of honour. Tomorrow's post isn't bad. When we get to day three, well, what can I say?That's when I went to heaven. Without the inconvenience of dying.

But I shouldn't give away too much. Those professionals done learned me a thing or two. Tension. Teasing. Timidity. Topiary. Alliteration. Exciting eternal expectation.

Or just getting you to read tomorrow's post.





7 comments:

Elektrolurch said...

I like food pics.
And i LOVE franconian food.
Didnt you try Schäufele? I prefer a fresh Schäufele to any Haxe out there, the best combination between the soft, tender meat of a Schweinsbraten and the crust of a Haxe.
And i really love how there is rarely any vegetarian food in such restaurants, except for cheese and bread sometimes.

Ron Pattinson said...

Electrolurch, look at the photo in the post before this one. That's a Schäufele I ate last year.

I love crackling so I just have to have a Haxe once every trip.

fred said...

What's the huge round dough object next to your steak in picture three? I've had that once before while dating a nice German woman. I can't remember what it is and I'd love to make it.

Prost!

Ron Pattinson said...

Fred, that's a Kloß, a sort of dumpling. It was a really good one, too. Soft and spongy, with a crispy crouton filling.

Matt said...

A very worthy post!

Jeffrey said...

Ron, all of that looks foul...

Why are the Germans so bad at food?

Ron Pattinson said...

Jeffo, have to disagree with you on that one. Pretty well all those meals were excellent. Not like than fancy French rubbish.