It's that time of year again

The time of boiled eggs and string. Some call it Christmastime. But for me it's Drinkalongathon time. When you get the chance to drink along with me as I plough through an ocean of booze.

You know the score. I  now rattle off a list of things that you'll need to join in. As I'm sure you all will want to.

You'll require:

1 crate of St. Bernardus Abt
4 rashers of bacon
5 pieces of string
1 bottle of the best Islay whisky you can afford
4 soft-boiled eggs
3 hard-boiled eggs
7 pieces of egg string
1 bottle of fino sherry
2 bottles of crappo sherry
1 Christmas jumper (left upstairs in a drawer, still wrapped)
4 crumpets
2 bottles of barrel-aged cachaca (amburana, if possible)
200 gm double Gloucester cheese
300 gm treble Gloucester cheese
1 packet cheesy biscuits
2 bottles of port
2 soft brown rolls
3 manly brown rolls
filo pastry to taste
1 small bottle of tonic water
3 large bottles of gin
2 ice cubes
1 day of shit Christmas TV programmes
2 bottles of Amstel Bok
1 step ladder
1 reserve sling

Quite a short list this year due to my continued incapacity.

The Drinkalongathon will start at 9 AM sharp. Be sure to have your eggs and string ready.