Wednesday, 15 September 2010

Four beer styles

One series of mega books. Yes, my often-announced, not very well defined Mega Book Series is finally hitting the shops. (If you count an online self-publishing site as a shop.)

I've thrown around a few titles in the last months. But not this one. Volume I of the Mega Book Series, which will cover all four British beer styles. (Unless Martyn Cornell can persuade me there are only three.) What else could I begin the series with, other than Britain's most noble and venerable style: Porter!.

620 pages of non-stop fun. That's two Jeffrey Archer novels. Or Porter!, the longest book ever written about Britain's oldest style. In detail that will send even the most seasoned archivist into a coma, I explore the beer that made London famous. For beer. Table after table after table. Poor jokes, a bit of pretension, quite a few typos and the old insult thrown at style nazis.

And recipes. More than 100. I lost count. Stacks of the bloody things. From 1804 to 1962. All but a handful, I haven't published before.

It's a doorstep of a book. You could always use it to knock a burglar unconscious. And what better present for a loved one? Perhaps for that special woman in your life*.

Buy "Porter!" now. You won't regret it. Well, perhaps not immediately. When the credit card bill arrives.

Buy "Porter!" now.

Buy "Porter!" now.

Shouting. What better way to sell?

* I assume the vast majority of my readers are male. I apologise to any female readers. And homosexuals. I should have just added man to that sentence, shouldn't I?


Martyn Cornell said...

… Unless Martyn Cornell can persuade me there are only three …

Two. Beer and ale. All the rest is quibbling.

Ron Pattinson said...

Beer, Ale and Pale Ale.

StringersBeer said...

I thought you meant I should buy one for my mum.

Thomas Barnes said...

@Martin: Ale is the only one that's truly British!

Beer is a despicable Flemish invention which perverts good English malt by flavoring it with a pernicious weed.

And I'll wag my codpiece at any knave who denies it! :)