Friday 4 October 2024

Smaller measures

As I was trudging my lonely path around the mean street of the Hoofddorpplein neighbourhood, I got to thinking of recent suggestion (I can't be arsed to look up the link). That moving to two-thirds instead off pints would reduce beer consumption.

That's total, utter, utter, utter, utter, fucking, bollocking bollocks.

There's the false assumption that people go out for a set number of drinks and then go home. That's not how most people drink.* They go to the pub for a fixed length of time. The number of drinks consumed is fluid.

You arrange to meet friends at eight and drink until closing time. You spend your lunch break down the pub. You meet at 1 PM for a few pints before the match. There's a set start and time. The latter usually being last orders. That's how social drinking mostly works. A fixed time, not a fixed number of drinks.

But there's an even bigger problem. People don't drink at the same rate from every size glass. The smaller it is, the quicker they drink. Two halves will be knocked back more quickly than a pint. As will a two thirds.

I'm not a fan of litre measures. They slow me right down. It becomes depressing that the thing takes so fucking long to empty. A half litre is much more manageable.

Do you see where I'm going? 

In my youth, 15 to 20 minutes per pint was a comfortable pace. Which I could up,  if needed, as last orders loomed. Six or seven pints in a two-hour session on average. I'd want at least five pints of Mild just to get an appetite for fish and chips on the way home..

I never said  to anyone "Let's go out for seven pints." It was "Let's meet at half eight in the Adelphi."

In general, the longer the session, the more pints I'd drink. I think this was especially true when drinking in a group.

Your average drinker, in a two-hour session would drink more if the glass were a two-thirds. Because they'd drink them more quickly than pints. And wouldn't have a fixed number of drinks in mind. 

Smaller measures would lead to increased consumption. Publicans should welcome them.


* Pensioners and filthy, dole scroungers** are exceptions. And people on shit wages. So I guess that's pretty much everyone in the UK now.

** I spent many happy years on the dole. Filthy scrounger that I was.

10 comments:

Matt said...

Serving beer in a two thirds of a pint measure has been legal in the UK since 2011. I've seen a two thirds glass in a pub once since then, at Alberts Schloss in Manchester, which opened in 2015 (since 2010, it's also been the law that you have to offer draught beer in a half pint glass: https://ale.gd/blog/2017/01/you-must-serve-half-pints/). It's clear that's there's no real demand from drinkers for them, and it would obviously entail expense for pubs if they all had to start stocking them. I think you're right that people would drink the same if not more if they replaced pints entirely with them (not so sure about that if they were replaced with half litres. There was an interesting case in Ireland in the eighties where a publican started offering them to avoid passing on a tax rise to his customers and I think people generally drank the same number as they had pints before, so a bit less beer overall).

bigLurch Habercom said...

Thing is the price wont come down. 2/3 will cost as much as a pint. TBH its a distraction from more important stuff.

Anonymous said...

I've occasionally drunk 2/3 pints - usually in a micropub, and always 'craft' beers of 6% ABV or stronger. I find 2/3 pint is just about right for a strong beer. After all, in Belgium the bottles which I drink in bars are generally 330ml - about half way between a half and two thirds.

Anonymous said...

Smaller glasses means more dirty glasses which means eventually they all get backed up at the dishwashing station and the front of the place runs out of clean glasses for service. Managers can't get their heads around why they're running out and don't want to buy more. So you end up with a bunch of customers calling it a night early.

Anonymous said...

Only specialist “craft beer” pubs use them as I have been told.
Oscar

Anonymous said...

6-6.3 percent is the maximum strength for a pint for me.
Oscar

Anonymous said...

With Sullivans red I take an hour or an hour and a bit per pint on account of its 5% ABV.
Oscar

Bribie G said...

Schooners are the default in Australia. However our beers are traditionally stronger than in the UK with most regular megaswill being of Fullers London Pride strength as we avoided our beer gravities being ravaged by the two world wars.
Pints are however creeping in and Guinness on tap has long been in pints.

Bribie G said...

I think it might have been in the novel 1984 but a comment from an old geezer about the new half litre to replace the pint:
"half a litre isn't enough but a litre makes me pee".

bigLurch Habercom said...

What about 1/3rds. The upcomming Nottingham beer festival will have a beer at 23% and only being sold in 1/3rds. TBH 23% is a bit silly really.