Wednesday, 20 November 2013

Crying on the bus

I barely shed a tear when my father died. Not that I wasn't upset. I was devastated. I just didn't cry as a teenager.

As the years have passed, my emotions have bubbled closer to the surface. The slightest shake and they rise and pop. Don't ask me why. If I understood that sort of shit I wouldn't be sitting at a desk typing stuff no-one will ever read.

In takes little to summon tears. A beautiful morning autumn sky and Bargain was enough at the bus stop today.

I used to worry about looking weak or girlish. Not any more. I didn't try to stop or hide the tears on the bus. Who cares what the other passengers think? I don't care about them.

I cried an ocean at my mother's funeral. Tears enough to wash both parents to heaven, nirvana; a quiet place.

Since then I care little for what others think of my tears.

My best writing is stained with tears.


BryanB said...

Looking for the "like" button... (-:

Gary Gillman said...

What do you mean by Bargain, Ron, The Who track?


Ron Pattinson said...

Of course it's the Who.

Live at Leeds, Who's Next and lots of Iron Butterfly are the main presences on my phone.

Phil said...

I was talking to my wife the other night about Wuthering Heights, and at one point I had to stop and take a run up at the sentence so as not to choke up. The embarrassing thing is that it was the Kate Bush song we were talking about.

No shame in being a blubber. There's inconvenience and occasional embarrassment, but no shame.

fomok57 said...

I am not sure whether I am right.. this is your blogside Ron...and you have written about crying... I tought it was apart of a poem , poetry....