Beer in the DDR (part 1)

I gave a talk at the Heimbrau Convention about brewing in the DDR a couple of weeks ago. A couple of people requested that I publish the slides. 

So here they are.. At least the first 10 slides. The other 345 slides will follow.

 

Dutch Beer Challenge 2026

You may have seen my video report on my day out in Rotterdam. Here's the boring, old wordy version.

Mostly, I judge in exotic places: Brazil, Chile, Singapore. Rarely in Europe. Even in my country of residence. Why is that? Because I rarely get invited and don't go hunting invitations. As I do for bits of South America I'd like to visit.

The last couple of years I have been invited to the Dutch Beer Challenge. And, despite it being in Rotterdam, I have accepted. Though, living in Amsterdam, I do feel obliged to slag off Rotterdam every now and again. It's part of our culture. Having said that, Rotterdam was the first city I lived in when I moved to Holland. When was that? Way back in the 1980s. Almost forty years ago. Where does the time go?

Thankfully, I can get to Rotterdam without needing to go into the centre of Amsterdam.Which I always try to avoid, if I can. It being a pure tourist hellhole currently. Even better, from Amsterdam Zuid I can get a fast train. One that uses the high-speed line. Saving me a massive 15 to 20 minutes.

Amsterdam Zuid is busy. Unsurprisingly, as it's commuting time. I'm in plenty of time for my train, giving me a chance to inspect how the rebuilding of the station is coming along. The new platforms for the metro look about done. While the train platforms are still very much under construction. I'm just looking forward to when the motorway is put underground. Currently, the platforms are jammed inbetween the tow carriageways. Leaving the impression of standing in the central divider of the motorway. Noisy traffic rushing past on either side.

The train is packed. Though I mange to grab a seat after Schiphol. I used to travel quite a lot by train. Not for work, but at the weekend. Dragging the kids on outings to all corners of the Netherlands. Including dragging them into pubs for a few frenetic drinks before bundling them back onto the train. Now they're older, these excursions have finished. And most of my travel is much further afield.

The No. 1 tram takes me through the incoherent jumble of the city centre and its "iconic" architecture to the east of the city. Where more fragments of the city's past erupt between the shiny modern blocks. My destination is the stadium of Excelsior, Rotterdam's third football club. At least it isn't Fejenoord.*

Judging is taking place in the bar inside one of the stands. Plenty of judges are already there when I arrive. Including quite a few I know. Not from Holland. Rather from judging in South America. I'm such a jet-setter. There's time for some chatting before the work starts.

I'm on a table with one Belgian and three Dutch judges. Meaning much of our discussions are in Dutch. Which is novel for me. It's usually English all the way when I'm judging.

We're on a lucky table and kick off with a flight of 17 non-alcoholic beers. My favourite. How often do I drink non-alcoholic beers voluntarily? Never. Only when I'm judging. If I don't want an alcoholic drink, I'll go for something else. Though I might consider an alcohol-free Catharina Sour.

They are improving, non-alcoholic beers. Clearly the technology has advanced considerably in the last 25 years. They even manage to taste pretty much like beer. Most of them.

We trundle along at a decent pace, getting through two-thirds of our allocated beers before lunch. Making the afternoon quite relaxed. Giving us plenty of time to savour the Barley Wines and Pastry Stouts. Finishing in plenty of time.

When judging is done, a bus whisks us off to De Koperen Kat brewery in Delft. In an industrial area to the south of the centre. We're early and have to hang around outside for a while.

It's a new brewery to me. Showing how terribly out of touch I am with the Dutch beer scene. It occupies a small corner of a much larger industrial building. Compact is how I would describe it.We're given a beer to keep our hands busy while we're given a short introduction to the brewery.

I get chatting to a very interesting bloke who works for Westmalle. And another who worked for several decades at Rodenbach. Always fun to meet new people. Especially ones from iconic Belgian breweries.

Our evening meal is very, er Dutch. For me, broodje kroket and chips. What can I say? It's filling.

I'm recommended D'oostPorter. Which is a Porter, surprisingly. A rather strong one, at 8.5% ABV. And rather nice. So nice, that I drink four of them. Full of roasty goodness.

The bus calls in at Delft station before heading back to Rotterdam. I get off there, as it's closer to home.

Finding the station entrance is a challenge. The station has been moved underground and the old building is now a restaurant. The new station is hidden under a council building. And has a very Alphaville vibe.

It's quite a while until the next train to Amsterdam Centraal. Luckily, there's one earlier going to Venlo via Schiphol. Calling at Amsterdam Zuid.

When I'm almost home, there's a sound of breaking glass behind me. Something has been thrown - or shot - at the bus, shattering a window. The couple sat behind me, right next to the break, look pretty shaken up. The bus pulls up just before the next stop, and we're told to wait for the next bus. Fortunately, it's my stop. No need to wait for another bus.

What was that? I don't think a stone, as there wasn't one inside the bus. My guess is an air rifle pellet.

What an unusual end to the day.



* My Dutch team is Sparta, the other Rotterdam club. For various complicated and irrelevant reason which I won't go into here.



Delftse Stadsbrouwerij De Koperen Kat
Schieweg 15, 
2627 AN Delft.
https://www.dekoperenkat.nl/ 

 

The video report. 

 

Let's Brew - 1995 Youngs DD

Now this is a confusing one.  A Pale Ale with a brevity about halfway between Ordinary and Special Bitter. What the hell was it? What was it called? Was it cask, keg or packaged?

The batch size was much smaller than for the standard draught beers, only 92 barrels, compared to 400 barrels or more. So clearly not one of their biggest sellers.

The grist is significantly different from the two draught Bitters, being all malt. There’s no flaked torrefied barley and no sugar. Also, no enzymic malt, which is interesting. Instead, it’s just pale and crystal malt.

The hops, however, are exactly the same as in the other Pale Ales: three English types. Though they are boiled for a little longer, 108 minutes rather than 70 minutes. In this case, I’ve only had to increase the hopping rate by about 25% to attain the bitterness level in the brewing record. 

1995 Youngs DD
pale malt	9.50 lb	95.00%
crystal malt 150 L	0.50 lb	5.00%
Fuggles 108 min	2.00 oz
Goldings 10 min	0.50 oz
OG	1043
FG	1009.5
ABV	4.43
Apparent attenuation	77.91%
IBU	30
SRM	11
Mash at	151º F
Sparge at	165º F
Boil time	108 minutes
pitching temp	62º F
Yeast	WLP002 English Ale

 

Listen to brewer John Hatch explain how they brewed at Youngs in the 1990s.  

DDR beer production, imports and exports 1955 - 1989

During the brief life of the DDR, beer production increased considerably. Beer export, too. Which I find somewhat more surprising.

Between 1955 and 1989, the quantity of beer produced more than doubled. Though that growth does seem to have stagnated in the 1980s. The same is true of exports, which grew rapidly in the 1960s and 1970s. Ending up - at the end of the DDR - at half a million hectolitres annually. Quite impressive. And around 2% of the beer produced.

Where was all this beer going? Luckily, I do know. At least for Radeberger. Which, as it was one of the leading export breweries, should give us a good idea of the destinations for DDR beer exports in general.

Egypt (ship supply port Port Said), Bulgaria, West Germany (West Berlin, Edeka, RPL Hamburg), Burma, Denmark, Finland, France, Greece, Guinea, Italy, South Yemen, Canary Islands, Cuba, Libya, Mali, Morocco, Mozambique, Netherlands, Austria, Sweden, Soviet Union, Spain, Tanzania, USA, North Vietnam.
Die Brau- und Malzindustrie in Deutschland-Ost zwischen 1945 und 1989, VLB, 2016, page 150.

That's quite a mix. Some socialist countries in Europe and beyond, Western Europe, Africa nad even the USA.

You'll note that Czechoslovakia wasn't on the list of export destinations. But I'm sure it would have been on a list of import sources. The only imported beer I can remember seeing waas Czech. Mostly in the form of Pilsner Urquell. 

DDR beer production, imports and exports (1,000 hl)
Year	production	imports	exports	balance
1955	11,772	144.6
1960	13,424	88.8	129.6	40.8
1965	13,633	78.1	158.8	80.7
1970	16,642	80.4	167.7	87.3
1976		207.9	353.7	145.8
1980	23,633	204.4	400.7	196.3
1985	24,288	25.0	562.9	537.9
1987		26.0	522.1	496.1
1988		24.6	528.5	503.9
1989	24,843	34.3	538.9	504.6
Average		91.41	373.7	282.2
Source:
Die Brau- und Malzindustrie in Deutschland-Ost zwischen 1945 und 1989, VLB, 2016, pages 300 and 301.

 

Dutch Beer Challenge 2026

 I go to Rotterdam to judge the Dutch Beer Challenge. By train and tram. It's so much fun.

 

Things I should have noticed (part 9,775,397)

I spend a lot of time staring at brewing records. Osmosis. That's how I extract most information.

Doesn't always work.

I bang on about the influence of taxation on beer. It's one of my things. That make me feel like I'm dead clever. Until I meet an actual expert. Time, then to walk off before I look like the idiot I am.

Harking back to the first sentence, how I came to understand brewing records is a bit of a mystery. To me. There was some backup from historical texts. Lots of staring in incomprehension, too. Then stuff making sense.

I won't claim to understand 100% of most records I have. Only the dead simple ones. Yet this really obvious observation had avoided me. Especially given my tax obsession.

This observation, in my defence, was complicated by the different ways of measuring beer gravity. Many breweries used the older method. Measuring gravity in pounds per barrel. While the new taxation system, introduced in 1880, used original gravity.

This new tax system was based on the gravity of the wort before fermentation. Measured in specific gravity, not pounds per barrel.

When I write my recipes, I always round the OG. Because they're almost never a round number. Despite brewers, especially those parti-gyling, being able to hit the same OG every time.

The Youngs beers in the 1990s almost all have gravities ending in .8º. Coincidence? I think not.

It's all about the taxation system. Which was based on the OG before fermentation. For tax purposes, they were rounding down. So Ordinary's 1036.8º was, for tax purposes, 1036º. It might seem trivial, but, with the high taxation of the UK, this could add up to a shitload of money.

I've seen the same thing at other breweries. How the hell did I not notice until now? 

Youngs beers in 1990
Beer	Style	OG
Exp	Pale Ale	1066.8
JYLL	Lager	1037.8
LA	Pale Ale	1030.8
ON	Barley Wine	1086.8
PA	Pale Ale	1036.8
PL	Pilsner	1047.8
Porter	Porter	1040.8
SPA	Pale Ale	1046.8
Winter Warmer	Strong Ale	1055.8
Source:
Young's brewing record held at Battersea Library, document number YO/RE/1/59.

 

Let's Brew Wednesday - 1995 Youngs Ram Rod

For some reason, there’s no Ram Rod – at least as far as I can find – in the 1990 Youngs brewing book. Perhaps they were just bottling Special Bitter as Ram Rod. As quite often the two beers had the same gravity.

That’s not the case here, as this version of Ram Rod has an OG 4º higher than Special. And quite a high degree of attenuation that leaves it pushing 5.5% ABV.

There’s not a great deal to the recipe. Just pale, crystal and enzymic malt, and some sugar. There were four types of pale malt, as was usual at Youngs. The sugar was something called FS5. Not sure what that is. But, as earlier No. 3 invert was used in the same way, I’ve substituted that.

Three types of hops were used. All English. Sadly, with no indication of variety or vintage. I’ve had to almost double the quantities to hit the bitterness level recorded in the brewing record. 

1995 Youngs Ram Rod
pale malt	10.75 lb	92.83%
crystal malt 150 L	0.50 lb	4.32%
No. 3 invert sugar	0.33 lb	2.85%
Fuggles 70 min	1.25 oz
Goldings 10 min	0.50 oz
OG	1051
FG	1010.5
ABV	5.36
Apparent attenuation	79.41%
IBU	31
SRM	12.5
Mash at	150º F
Sparge at	165º F
Boil time	70 minutes
pitching temp	62º F
Yeast	WLP002 English Ale

 

Listen to brewer John Hatch explain how they brewed at Youngs in the 1990s.  

Brauerei Potsdam-Rehbrücke output in 1988

The division of Germany caused many problems. In Potsdam, it was one of beer supply. Before the war, the area had mostly been served by breweries in West Berlin. Local breweries, which were small and old-fashioned, were unable to meet local demand. And breweries in East Berlin didn't have the spare capacity to supply Potsdam.

In the mid-1960s, local breweries were only able to produce about 50% of the beer consumed in Potsdam. Therefor it was decided to construct an entirely new brewery in Rehbrücke. It was supposed to start production in 1971. However, due to problems in obtaining the machinery, it didn't actually start production until 1981.

This is one of the few places in "Die Brau- und Malzindustrie in Deutschland-Ost zwischen 1945 und 1989" where there are some numbers for the output of different beer types. And it's very different from what we saw at the Diamant brewery of Magdeburg in 1960. Where three-quarters of their output was Helles.

In Potsdam, Pilsner was king, accounting for over 50% of production. And that's just the standard Pilsner. If you include Pilsator and Spezial, that increases to 88%. While Helles was a mere 5%. Did this represent a change in the relative popularity of the different styles? Or was Potsdam just specialising in Pilsner? I suspect a bit of both. It could also be a regional thing, as I remember Berlin pubs mostly sold Pilsner, not Helles.

Interestingly, three strong beers were brewed: pale and dark Bock and Märkischer Landmann.

I can remember drinking Potsdam Rex Pilsner, as it did seem to be available in Thüringen. At least in some outlets. I think in Delikat shops. It was a decent enough Pils. 

Brauerei Potsdam-Rehbrücke output in 1988
type	hl	%
Vollbier Hell	40,000	5.34%
Pilsner	444,200	59.26%
Spitzenbier	21,300	2.84%
Spezialbier	118,000	15.74%
Pilsator	99,900	13.33%
Heller Bock	10,500	1.40%
Dunkler Bock	9,200	1.23%
Märkischer Landmann	6,500	0.87%
total	749,600
Source:
Die Brau- und Malzindustrie in Deutschland-Ost zwischen 1945 und 1989, VLB, 2016, page 269.

 

Radeberger Production and Sales

My new favourite book "Die Brau- und Malzindustrie in Deutschland-Ost zwischen 1945 und 1989" might be a bit light on information about the actual beer brewed in the DDR. It does still have some numbers. Lovely numbers.

For example, those we'll be looking at today. Which are for the Radeberger brewery. Which, along with Wernesgrüner, was one of the main export breweries in the DDR. Meaning that they were allocated the best quality materials. And, for at least the export beer, brewed to the Reuinheitsgebot.

I was fairly surprised to see that they were already brewing in 1946. In some parts of Germany they didn't resume brewing until 1948 or 1949. For example, in the British occupied zone, the only brewing allowed for several years after the end of the war was for the British army.

Output was rising constantly. Not that surprising, given the generally improving economic conditions. And the fact that the brewery was given preferential treatment.

There seems to be a mistake in the figures in the book. The numbers under bottled beer seem to actually be total output. I know that because the 1988 figures are broken down by destination and the total comes to 449,337 hl. Which is the number given as bottled beer output in the first table. I've adjusted the figures in the first table accordingly.

There's a note to the first table that says:

"Until 1956, the Radeberger Export Brewery produced all types of beer, from Malzbier (6%), Vollbier Hell (10.5%), and Pilsner (12%) to Bockbier (16%). From 1956 onwards, only Radeberger Pilsner was produced."

Quite early, then, that they concentrated on producing Pilsner.

In the second table you can see that very little leaked out to the general public. Around three-quarters was either exported abroad, or reserved for special use internally. Interhotels were the hotels where foreigners stayed. The SED (Socialistische Einheitspartei Deutschlands) was the ruling communist party. The Palace in Berlin was the Volkspalast, the DDR parliament building.

One of the surprises in the book was how much tank beer there was in the DDR. Something I never noticed.

Radeberger Production and Sales
Year	Hectolitres		of which Export	total
	in bottles	in casks
1946	125,000			125,000
1951	144,678			144,678
1956	274,880	120		275,000
1960	155,820	83,180	35,547	239,000
1961	174,823	72,419	19,552	247,242
1968	135,000	139,000	-	274,000
1972	168,235	145,000	-	313,235
1976	202,566	137,559	-	340,125
1980	258,178	134,305	-	392,483
1984	262,746	177,452	-	440,198
1988	291,601	157,736	-	449,337
Source:
Die Brau- und Malzindustrie in Deutschland-Ost zwischen 1945 und 1989, VLB, 2016, page 150.

Radberger sales by destination in 1988
destination	hl
Radeberger Pilsner Export for foreign markets 3) amounting to:	177,213
Radeberger Pilsner Export for the domestic market for all Interhotels, special customers (e.g., Soviet Army), and central customers (government and SED Central Committee) amounting to:	141,450
Radeberger Pilsner (Pilsator)	110,500
Radeberger Tank Beer for restaurants in the region and the Palace in Berlin	20,174
Total:	449,373
Source:
Die Brau- und Malzindustrie in Deutschland-Ost zwischen 1945 und 1989, VLB, 2016, page 150.

 

 

 

In Amsterdam

Yet another video. This time recent stuff. Recorded in the last few days. 

How much of each type of beer did a DDR brewery brew?

My new favorite book, "Die Brau- und Malzindustrie in Deutschland-Ost zwischen 1945 und 1989", is packed full of information. Loads of stuff about the organisation of the industry, raw materials, research and all sorts of technical information. But almost nothing about the beer produced.

When I first heard about the book I had two thoughts. That it could provide loads of information for my putative book on DDR beer. And that it might make my book redundant. On closer observation, it became clear that the focus of my book would be very different.

To my surprise, the VLB book doesn't even cover the standards documents, such as TGL 7764, which define the characteristics of each type of beer. While I lean very heavily on these documents. As well as Kunze's "Technologie Brauer und Mälzer", another of my favourite books.

In the section describing individual breweries in the VLB book, there is sometimes a mention of the beers brewed. Though, in many cases, it doesn't seem to be an exhaustive list. The most useful is for the Diamant brewery in Magdeburg. Which, very usefully, seems to be a full list and gives the quantities brewed.

Unsurprisingly, as it was the most popular style, most of the beer brewed by Diamant was Helles. Almost three-quarters of their output, in fact. A long way behind, in second place, was Pilsner. Those two beers combined accounted for 90% of the beer produced. In third place was Einfachbier Dunkel, with just a 5% share.

The two strong beers, Bock and Porter, were produced in very small quantities. Between the two of them, only around 6,000 hl were brewed. Less than 3% of total output.

The average gravity of all the beer Diamant brewed was 11.6º Plato. Just a shade over the gravity of Helles. That's around 1046º. Which is 9º higher than average UK gravity at the time. Which I find interesting.

How typical was the Diamant brewery? It's hard to say. Some breweries, such as those brewing for export, were more specialised, producing primarily, or even exclusively, Pilsner. These numbers do, at least, give us an idea of what a reasonably-sized regional brewery was brewing.

Diamant Brauerrei Magdeburg output in 1960
Beer	OG º Plato	hl	%
Einfachbier dunkel	6	12,024	5.20%
Vollbier Hell	11.5	170,990	74.01%
Deutsches Pilsner	13	37,561	16.26%
Weißer Bock	16	4,686	2.03%
Deutscher Porter	18	1,474	0.64%
Doppelkaramelbier	12	4,304	1.86%
Average/Total	11.6	231,039
Source:
Die Brau- und Malzindustrie in Deutschland-Ost zwischen 1945 und 1989, VLB, 2016, page 253.

 

Let's Brew - 1990 Youngs Porter

Now here’s a real oddity: a London Porter. I can remember when Youngs introduced this beer and being dead excited. Not sure how long they brewed it for. I don’t think it was for very long. I recall drinking it once, but it being in terrible condition.

When Fullers introduced a Porter of their own somewhat later, they went for a pre-WW I gravity of 1050º. While Youngs seem to have opted for a lower gravity. I was going to say interwar strength, but in the 1930s, Youngs Porter was only 1035º. They seem to have pulled the 1041º gravity out of the air.

The recipe is quite similar to Oatmeal Stout. Except there’s crystal malt instead of flaked oats. It’s quite a simple recipe, really. Just pale and crystal malt, roast barley and Young’s Special Mix sugar.

There was only one type of hop: English, from the 1988 harvest. And, as far as I can tell, only one hop addition at the beginning of the boil. 

1990 Youngs Porter
pale malt	6.75 lb	70.90%
roast barley	0.50 lb	5.25%
crystal malt 150 L	1.50 lb	15.76%
glucose	0.50 lb	5.25%
molasses	0.25 lb	2.63%
caramel 2000 SRM	0.02 lb	0.21%
Fuggles 60 min	2.25 oz
OG	1041
FG	1012
ABV	3.84
Apparent attenuation	70.73%
IBU	29
SRM	29
Mash at	149º F
Sparge at	165º F
Boil time	60 minutes
pitching temp	59º F
Yeast	WLP002 English Ale

 

Listen to brewer John Hatch explain how they brewed at Youngs in the 1990s.  

Franconia 2012

Another video of Franconia more than a decade ago. Just shows how long it takes me to get around to doing things. Like editing video. Still, better late than never.

In the video I visit Ebermannstadt,  Aufseß and Bamberg.

 

Hop growing in the DDR

When researching my recent talk on brewing in the DDR, I struggled to find much about the varieties of hops grown. Which was rather frustrating.

All that frustration disappeared this week when I got my hand on a copy of Die Brau- und Malzindustrie in Deutschland-Ost zwischen 1945 und 1989, published by the VLB in Berlin in 2016.

One thing I hadn't considered was the lack of expertise in hop cultivation in the DDR. Though there had historically been hop growing in some parts of the region, none had been grown for decades. Who were the first new hop farmers? Before there had been chance to train up any locals.

In the book there's this sentence:

"As early as 1950, hop growers from the Bohemian growing region planted the first hops in Thuringia (Gustav Dießl in Wasserthaleben and Franz Puls in Clingen)."
Die Brau- und Malzindustrie in Deutschland-Ost zwischen 1945 und 1989, VLB, 2016, page 60.

These men were Sudeten Germans expelled from Czechoslovakia. They seem to have played a crucial role in training a new generation of hop farmers:

"Especially at the beginning of planting, under the difficult conditions of the time, such as a shortage of hop vines, lack of knowledge, and insufficient technical resources, experienced practitioners and many new hop pioneers dedicated themselves to this crop. Crucial to its successful development was the experience and personal commitment of many hop growers from Bohemia who saw their ambition in creating something new. They passed on their knowledge to interested hop masters who had decided to cultivate hops and were furthering their education at the agricultural college in Naumburg."
Die Brau- und Malzindustrie in Deutschland-Ost zwischen 1945 und 1989, VLB, 2016, page 60.

Unsurprisingly, given the background of the hop-pioneers, the type of hop initially grown was Saaz. Had these refugee hop-growers brought sets of Saaz with them, or had they been imported through official channels? I'd love to know.

Officials wanted to find a suitable hop variety to introduce as standard. But were struggling. Then, in 1962, at a hop congress in Warsaw, conversations with a UK hop-grower led to the import of 2,000 Northern Brewer cuttings the following year. In 1964, cultivation began at ten locations.*

Initially, brewers weren't that keen on the variety, considering English hops to be inferior. This attitude changed in 1966.

"During tours of a renowned export brewery, the hop masters, as visitors, were annoyed when it was said: "The top quality of the beer is based on the fact that we have our own wells and only use imported malt and Saaz hops!" At the Leipzig Trade Fair in 1966, during a consultation with foreign trade officials, it was revealed that 25 tons of Hallertau hops had been imported, while approximately twice that amount of Saaz hops from our own harvest had been delivered. This absurdity was justified by claiming that the imported Saaz hops from the previous year had too few bittering substances and that the ultrasonic treatment carried out in the brewery in question did not result in any savings. This jeopardized the allocation to the engineering budget. Since even the expensively purchased Hallertau hops had a lower alpha acid content, good advice was hard to come by. Therefore, the brewery was offered and used an initially anonymous batch of hops with 6.8 percent alpha acids. Suddenly, they couldn't get enough of this hop."
Die Brau- und Malzindustrie in Deutschland-Ost zwischen 1945 und 1989, VLB, 2016, page 62.

From there, Northern Brewer went from strength to strength. Asd no more cuttings could be imported gfrom the UK, a programme of cutting production was introduced to cover demand. Ultimnately, almost 90% of the cultivated area was dedicated to Northern Nrewer.**

What an interesting story. I'd assumed that the hops grown in the DDR would have been German or Czech types. Weird that they were English variety.


* Die Brau- und Malzindustrie in Deutschland-Ost zwischen 1945 und 1989, VLB, 2016, page 61.
** Die Brau- und Malzindustrie in Deutschland-Ost zwischen 1945 und 1989, VLB, 2016, page 62.
 

The long journey home

Dolores is on tea duty again before I awake.

“I suppose you won’t want any tea this morning.”

“What makes you think that?”

“Because of the car journey.”

“What?”

“And pissing yourself.”

“Oh, I’m not worried about that. Give me a cup of tea.”

“That’s not what you said on Friday.”

“I’ve been to sleep since then. As my Mun used to say.”

“What does that mean?”

“No idea. It’s just a general get out.”

“Get out of what?”

“Any responsibility.”

“Perfect for you.”

There’s nothing like a cup of tea in the morning. Worth risking a trouser embarrassment. 

You can guess what I have for breakfast. Don’t judge me. I am briefly tempted by the Nürnberger. But stick with just bacon and scrambled egg.

“You should go easy on the bacon, Ronald.”

“But a br…

“I know. A breakfast isn’t a breakfast without a large portion of heart disease.”

“That’s not what I was going to say.”

“Just what you were doing.”

“I’ll get some fruit in a minute.”

“That won’t make up for ten rashers of bacon.”

“It’s only seven rashers. And they’re tiny.”

“Right.”

“It’s OK, then?”

“I said, right.”

“That doesn’t sound like a: right, it’s OK. More like a: right, you believe that if you want.”

“Right.”

“You’re not making things any clearer.”

“Right.”

After we’re done eating, Lars Marius Garshol comes and sits by me. I’ve only seen him briefly so far this weekend. It’s good to have a chance for a proper talk.

We have a fascinating discussion about systems of taxation and how they influence the brewing industry and beer. So fascinating that Dolores goes upstairs to pack before we’re done.

I really appreciate conversations like this. There aren’t many people I can have serious discussions with about some topics.  One fewer since Martyn Cornell died. I have to grab every chance I get.

Just before checkout time I drag myself away from Lars and join Dolores upstairs.

I’d hoped our luggage would be later on the way back, after selling lots of books. All the beer I’ve been given put paid to that hope. Not that I’m complaining. About the beer, I mean. I’m obviously not overjoyed at the weight.

We leave Romrod around 11:30. Christoph seems to have a similar luggage experience to us. The beer that he brought and served being replaced by beer he’s been given.

As we zoom along the autobahn, me and Christoph chat about the conference and beer in general.

It’s getting on for 15:00 when we’re dropped off at Düsseldorf Hauptbahnhof. About four hours before our train is due. We dump our bags in the left luggage and head towards town.

Our plan? Not that it’s much of one. Head towards Schuhmacher. Hopefully finding somewhere on the way to have a beer and maybe something to eat.

We don’t get even halfway to Schuhmacher before finding somewhere that looks OK. Barco.

“What do you think, Ronald?”

“They’ve got a Füchschen Alt sign. Let’s go in.”

For a German pub, the beer list is quite long. Six draught beers: Füchschen Alt, Peters Kölsch, Radeberger Pilsner, Mythos Hellenic Lager and Guinness Irish Stout. Not often you see Kölsch in Düsseldorf.

“Ein Alt, Bitte.”

What else would I drink in Düsseldorf? Certainly not Kölsch.

Dolores has a Hefeweizen. No surprise there.

“Do you want to eat? I wouldn’t mind something.” I ask.

“Can do. It seems to be some sort of Greek place.”

“Do you want to share a Schnitzel?”

“That’s not very Greek.”

“It’s what I feel like.”

“What about a souvlaki as well?”

“OK.”

The souvlaki is pretty nice. And only four euros. The Schnitzel is OK. Not huge, but not expensive, either.

“Can you hear the radio?” Dolores asks.

“What about it.” 

“It’s Greek.”

“Is it?”

“Can’t you hear that?”

“No.”

“You’re going deaf.”

“What?”

“Very funny.”

Dolores has been tracking our train on an app. It started in Munich, got delayed a little, then caught up again.

“You never know with DB.” Dolores says. “Something always goes wrong. You’re lucky if your train runs at all.”

She’s had a lot of bad experiences when visiting her sister. Trains that didn’t turn up. Ones that just stopped at the border. Then there were all the delayed trains and missed connections.

“Hopefully, our train will be OK. Like the one out here.”

“That hadn’t travelled hundreds of kilometres in Germany.”

“I hadn’t thought of that.”

That’s got me worried. I fancy sleeping in my own bed tonight. Any bed, come to think of it.

We’re in no rush to leave. As we still have quite a bit of time before our train.

Around 18:00, we roll up at the station. Where we browse the bookshop before we pick up our bags.

Platform 17 should be it. The board by the stairs to the platform lists trains that all should have already left.

“Why are they showing trains that have already left?” I ask.

“Look more closely. They’re all delayed.”

“That’s not a good sign.”

Dolores checks the app. “Our train is still on time. For now.”

“Very reassuring.”

We find seats on the platform. And listen to all the delayed train announcements. Every train seems to be delayed. There are varied excuses. Sorry, reasons.

The train was prepared late. A police action. Unauthorised personnel on the track. A previous train was delayed. A technical problem.

“At least they’re being imaginative.” I remark.

“I’d prefer the trains to be on time.”

“Don’t be so unreasonable.”

Our train comes up on the board as the one after next. And on time. Hooray! Then disappears again.

Dolores checks her app. 

“It says that our train has already left.”

“Pretty sure I didn’t see it.”

“Unless it left from a different platform.”

Cue mild panic.

An announcement informs us that our train is delayed twenty minutes due to a technical problem. Great. How do they know they can fix it in twenty minutes? Answer: they don’t.

The delay keeps increasing.

“If it’s over an hour late we’ll get some of our money back.” Dolores says.

“That’s something. As long as it runs all the way to Amsterdam.”

The train arrives seventy minutes late. And is pretty full. We a bit of messing around, we find seats. Plopping down with some degree of relief.

I prepare myself a “special drink” for the journey. Drinking half of a bottle of cola then filling it up with my hotel whisky.

“Don’t go crazy, Ronald.”

“You know me.”

“Exactly. That’s why I’m saying: don’t go crazy.”

“You have such a distorted opinion of me.”

“Realistic, Ronald, realistic.”

I don’t go crazy. And the trip back is uneventful. If late.

In Amsterdam, it’s raining. Now there’s a surprise. We get a tram straight away. And are soon back home.

Andrew is waiting for us. Without any tea. He’s no Dolores.



Barco
Charlottenstraße 51, 
40210 Düsseldorf.
http://www.barco-lounge.de/ 

 

 

A video, this time with a commentary. Of sorts.