Photos

“Don’t get angry, Dolores.”

“Why?”

“When you start looking at the photos.”

“Which photos?”

“Of me and the kids in Newark.”

“I know that. Which specific ones?”

“The ones from the lounge.”

“With all the glasses of whisky. I know what you get up to in the lounge.”
 

Dolores knows me so well. Too well.

“These are boring. How many photos did you take out of the plane window?” Dolores asks.

“A few. Quite a few.”

“Can we just skip them?”

“Don’t you like looking at the English countryside?”

“Yes. The real thing. Not random murky photos.”

“What do you mean?”

“It wasn’t actually a great day for photography.”

“I did my best.”

“I know. That’s what’s so sad.”

“You can see the Humber in this one.”

“How thrilling.”

I can tell Dolores is excited, really. She’s just very good at hiding it. Excellent, in fact. Looking at her, you’d swear she was bored shitless.

“What’s this one?”

“Don’t you recognise it? The Sainsbury’s in Balderton.”

“Why did you take a photo of that?”

“Why not?”

“Because it’s boring.”
 

“I’m just documenting what Balderton looks like in 2024.”

“Exactly the same as last year. Or 2000.”

“That’s not true. There’s a drive-through Starbucks now.”

“Did you go there?”

“We didn’t have a car and I hate Starbucks. So, yes.”

“That’s the chip shop, isn’t it?”

“Yes. And this is a monster pile of chips. That’s one portion. Three of us couldn’t finish them”
 

“What else did you get?”

“The last pie. And three fish, though they only charged for two. As they were about to close.”

“Did Andrew eat anything?”

“Some of the fish and some chips. You didn’t ask about Alexei.”

“I know he’d have eaten. No need to ask.”

“You didn’t ask what I had. The pie and a bit of fish. And some chips.”

“That’s fascinating, Ronald.”

Dolores is keen on knowing every detail of my life.

“I had some lurid green mushy peas, too.”

“Really?” Dolores says, pretending to suppress a yawn. She’s so good at disguising her enthusiasm.

“This is what they look like.”

“Yes, Ronald. Do you have any photos of the kids?”

“The kids?”

“Yes, the two boys you took with you.”

“Oh, should I have taken photos of them?”

Dolores makes that noise. I think it means that she’s dead impressed. Well, that’s what I want to believe.