My style has been described as stream of unconsciousness. I'll be honest with you. I started this post with no idea of what the competition question would be. The idea count now stands at almost one.
I hadn't meant to post this yet. Slipped through by mistake. But, usefully, one of you has come up with an idea for me. No need to waste my own brain power.
Thank you Rod:
"I think you should organise a competition, just for a bit of Xmas fun, to see who can get the most mistakes into one short sentence....."
You could call it the Papazian Cup (but let's not get him to judge it, eh? He just might not spot all the mistakes....)
Papazian Cup it is then. There will be more than one prize. Extra marks will be awarded for particularly outrageous or amusing mistakes.
(Added some hours later)
Right. I've misunderstood my own competition. That's a new one. My apologies to the entrants who understood the rules correctly.
But do try and keep it to one sentence. Though, should the muse possess you, feel free to write more. And you can submit quotes from bona fide experts if you want.
Is that clearer?
the answer is 42
ReplyDeleteDid we ever get the answers to/winners of the last competition Ron? The one to see how many mistakes you could spot in Protz's piece on Russian Imperial Stout.
ReplyDeleteMatt, Zythophile won that contest. I just forgot to announce it.
ReplyDeleteKorev, you're a winner!
ReplyDeleteGet in touch with me through the email on my website:
http://www.europeanbeerguide.net
I was more interested to know whether Protz's claims that Russian Imperial Stout was heavily hopped to "withstand the rigours of the long sea journey" and brewed with Pilsener malt that came back in empty barrels from the Baltic and - at "only 7%" abv - Sam Smith's version is 'not true to style' are correct.
ReplyDeleteAs I said the other day -
ReplyDelete"I think you should organise a competition, just for a bit of Xmas fun, to see who can get the most mistakes into one short sentence....."
You could call it the Papazian Cup (but let's not get him to judge it, eh? He just might not spot all the mistakes....)
Ron, do you allow entries in non-english languages ?
ReplyDeleteThere's a huge potential in France for this kind of thing.
Notably a recent press release by Brasseurs de France about la Bière de Noël claiming that Christmas beers were first brewed on Norway for the Jol winter solstice festival, i.e. in pre-christian times.
But I could certainly find a lot worse...
Laurent, polyglot that I am, foreign-language entries are welcome.
ReplyDeleteSeveral people have asked the origins of stout and porter. Back in the 13th century, it was a Belgian ale called Stout Porter, being named after an old stout porter who worked at Waterloo. This beer, being the original, was 100% true to style - which is strange, as it was a completely clear liquid (this was due to the Belgian Purity laws which dictated that all brewing had to be totally transparent).
ReplyDeleteIn the 14th century it was brought over to Britain, but the style immediately became less than 100% true due to small mammals being added to the mash to provide extra fizz and fermentation (English brewers had misheard the Belgians' accent as "stoat porter"). No matter, because Danish brewers in Northampton quickly went to court and stopped this ale being sold due to it being too like their own lager - almost colourless, fizzy and with a slight whiff of polecat wee. It wasn't until the 20th century that the beer took on the dark colouring we associate with it today. Brewers had started adding clinker to the mash, which gave it a smokey flavour. Coal Porter, as it was known, became a success. Inspired by this, more variants were invented: Nyree Dawn Porter, which came to the UK from New Zealand. Gail Porter, which had a great body and a smooth head. Stout Yeoman, made with freeze-dried mashed potato, and finally Alec Guinness - which looked quite weak, but had a force which was strong.
OK, here's my entry for the Papazian Cup (although it could just as easily be the Protz Shield):
ReplyDelete"Porter began as a mixture of brown, stock and pale ales but disappeared by the end of the nineteenth century, although the weakest version became mild ale which when bottled is known as brown ale".
Matt, that's a pretty strong entry. Where's it from and who's the author.
ReplyDelete"Hodgson consciously invented a new style of beer, which he immediately christened India Pale Ale, in the knowledge that only this extra-high gravity, extra-high hopped ale would survive the passage to India and actually mature wonderfully, and with the intention that it would be diluted down upon arrival to render it true to traditional Pale Ale style."
ReplyDeleteYou do realise these are supposed to be real quotes? Please include author and source.
ReplyDeleteAlright Ron - your blog, your rules....... I thought making up quotes was quite fun actually.
ReplyDeleteThis, from the Papster hisself, is pretty hard to beat, as I said a couple of days ago. Four mistakes in 15 words is going to be a tough one to better, I think. Here goes -
"The Czechs invented pilsener beer in the town of Plzen in the late 19th century."
Er, no, Ron. The rules weren't very clear on that point. I am the author as I just wrote it! As did Steve with his entry his I think, although he ignored the bit about "one short sentence".
ReplyDeleteLooks like there are two competitions.
ReplyDeleteWell, when I wrote this -
ReplyDelete"I think you should organise a competition, just for a bit of Xmas fun, to see who can get the most mistakes into one short sentence....."
I actually meant that we pissheads could make up our own, but it is your blog, after all.......
I wrote the IPA quote, and I assert the moral right to be indentified as the author.
I still think Charlie's Pilsner quote should win.
"Looks like there are two competitions."
ReplyDeleteLOL!!
Now we're having two competitions - how about the Papazian Cup and the Protz Shield? - here's my entry for the 'real quote' one, from the man himself:
ReplyDelete"Most modern bitters are too dark and too weak to be considered true members of the IPA or pale ale family."
Roger Protz, beer-pages 06/05: http://beer-pages.com/protz/features/ipa.htm
zminor | California | BA: Feb 19, 2008 | online user online
ReplyDeleteOrigin of barrel-aging?
While barrel-aging has been going on for a long time, as others have stated, I believe this was mostly for sour beers. This is less used to impart characteristics of the barrel, but more as a vessel to carry the bugs and bacteria that sour the beer.
I know it is 2 sentences but it is so awesomely wrong as to be worthy of consideration. And Beer Advocate has only the true beer aficionados so it must be correct.
How about a heading from the BBC news site:
ReplyDelete"First lager brew house 'at risk'"
BeerAdvocate currently has a thread on whether or not hops make you drunker. That says everything.
ReplyDelete"BeerAdvocate currently has a thread on whether or not hops make you drunker. That says everything."
ReplyDeleteHoly crap! That's got to be the dumbest thread I've ever read on that message board (and that's saying a lot). I am now dumber having read it.
Regarding the apparent use by Courage of some pilsener malt in a Russian Stout grist, the following 1800's French brewing text gives two recipes for brown stout in which a pale-coloured malt was the minority grain:
ReplyDeletehttp://books.google.com/books?id=XS1DAAAAIAAJ&pg=PA606&dq=Basset+%2B+brown+stout&lr=&as_drrb_is=b&as_minm_is=1&as_miny_is=1600&as_maxm_is=1&as_maxy_is=1880&as_brr=0&cd=1#v=onepage&q=&f=false
Also why would the brewery have told this circa-1980 to the writers and researchers who came calling? I wonder if perhaps the practice was part of Courage's method before Courage acquired BP, which assumes Courage made porter before the purchase. I don't know for certain that it did. But even if it didn't, Courage acquired other breweries, didn't it? Maybe this was part of their process.
Gary
I have a further suggestion which needn't range as widely as a specification deriving from a Courage-acquired brewery or an obscure 19th century porter recipe: BP had pilsener malt on hand after WW I, probably more than it needed for the nascent lager market. Why? BP was brewing lager, starting in 1922 I understand.
ReplyDeleteIt makes sense to me that it might have used some in its stout recipe, at least in the Russian Stout. Waste not want not. This would tie in to Michael Jackson writing that Courage had used pilsener malt in the Russian Stout as far back as anyone could recall. Michael wrote too that the use occurred in London, i.e., not apparently in Tadcaster where the last stocks of Russian Stout were brewed.
Michael Jackson, and other early modern beer writers, were visiting Courage approximately two generations after the inception of lager brewing at BP. In business life that is a long time...
Gary
BJCP
ReplyDelete"The term "IPA" is loosely applied in commercial English beers today, and has been (incorrectly) used in beers below 4% ABV."